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What Is Gender Socialization? Definition and Examples

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Ph.D., Psychology, Fielding Graduate University
M.A., Psychology, Fielding Graduate University
B.A., Film Studies, Cornell University

Gender socialization is the process by which we learn our culture's gender-related rules, norms, and expectations. The most common agents of gender socialization—in other words, the people who influence the process—are parents, teachers, schools, and the media. Through gender socialization, children begin to develop their own beliefs about gender and ultimately form their own gender identity.

Sex vs. Gender

The terms sex and gender are often used interchangeably. However, in a discussion of gender socialization, it’s important to distinguish between the two.
Sex is biologically and physiologically determined based on an individual's anatomy at birth. It is typically binary, meaning that one's sex is either male or female.
Gender is a social construct. An individual's gender is their social identity resulting from their culture's conceptions of masculinity and femininity. Gender exists on a continuum.
Individuals develop their own gender identity, influenced in part by the process of gender socialization.

Gender Socialization in Childhood

The process of gender socialization begins early in life. Children develop an understanding of gender categories at a young age. Studies have shown that children can discern male voices from female voices at six months old, and can differentiate between men and women in photographs at nine months old. Between 11 and 14 months, children develop the ability to associate sight and sound, matching male and female voices with photographs of men and women. By age three, children have formed their own gender identity . They have also begun to learn their culture’s gender norms, including which toys, activities, behaviors, and attitudes are associated with each gender.

Because gender categorization is a significant part of a child's social development, children tend to be especially attentive to same-gender models . When a child observes same-gender models consistently exhibit specific behaviors that differ from the behaviors of other-gender models, the child is more likely to exhibit the behaviors learned from the same-gender models. These models include parents, peers, teachers, and figures in the media.

Children’s knowledge of gender roles and stereotypes can impact their attitudes towards their own and other genders. Young children, in particular, may become especially rigid about what boys and girls "can" and "cannot" do. This either-or thinking about gender reaches its peak between the ages of 5 and 7 and then becomes more flexible.

Agents of Gender Socialization

As children, we develop gender-related beliefs and expectations through our observations of and interactions with the people around us. An "agent" of gender socialization is any person or group that plays a role in the childhood gender socialization process. The four primary agents of gender socialization are parents, teachers, peers, and the media.

Parents are typically a child’s first source of gender socialization. Starting at birth, parents communicate different expectations to their children depending on their sex. For example, a son may engage in more roughhousing with his father, while a mother takes her daughter shopping. The child may learn from their parents that certain activities or toys correspond with a particular gender (think of a family that gives their son a truck and their daughter a doll). Even parents who emphasize gender equality may inadvertently reinforce some stereotypes due to their gender socialization.

Teachers and school administrators model gender roles and sometimes demonstrate gender stereotypes by responding to male and female students in different ways. For example, separating students by gender for activities or disciplining students differently depending on their gender may reinforce children’s developing beliefs and assumptions.

Peer interactions also contribute to gender socialization. Children tend to play with same-gender peers. Through these interactions, they learn what their peers expect of them as boys or girls. These lessons may be direct, such as when a peer tells the child that a certain behavior is or is not "appropriate" for their gender. They can also be indirect, as the child observes same- and other-gendered peers' behavior over time. These comments and comparisons may become less overt over time, but adults continue to turn to same-gendered peers for information about how they are supposed to look and act as a man or a woman.

Media, including movies, TV, and books , teaches children about what it means to be a boy or a girl. Media conveys information about the role of gender in people’s lives and can reinforce gender stereotypes. For example, consider an animated film that depicts two female characters: a beautiful but passive heroine, and an ugly but active villain. This media model, and countless others, reinforces ideas about which behaviors are acceptable and valued (and which are not) for a particular gender.

Gender Socialization Throughout Life

Gender socialization is a lifelong process. The beliefs about gender that we acquire in childhood can affect us throughout our lives. The impact of this socialization can be big (shaping what we believe we are capable of accomplishing and thus potentially determining our life's course), small (influencing the color we choose for our bedroom walls), or somewhere in the middle.

As adults, our beliefs about gender may grow more nuanced and flexible, but gender socialization can still affect our behavior, whether in school, the workplace, or our relationships.

Bussey, Kay, and Albert Bandura. “Social Cognitive Theory of Gender Development and Differentiation.” Psychological Review , vol. 106, no. 4, 1999, pp. 676-713.
“Gender: Early Socialization: Sythesis.” Encyclopedia of Early Childhood Development , Aug. 2014, http://www.child-encyclopedia.com/gender-early-socialization/synthesis
Martin, Carol Lynn, and Diane Ruble. “Children’s Search for Gender Cues: Cognitive Perspectives on Gender Development.” Current Directions in Psychological Science , vol, 13, no. 2, 2004, pp. 67-70. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.0963-7214.2004.00276.x
McSorley, Brittany. “Gender Socialization.” Udemy , 12 May 2014, https://blog.udemy.com/gender-socialization/
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Your Guide to Gender Socialization

While the majority of gender socialization happens in childhood, this subtle instruction continues throughout life and can come from a variety of sources, such as family traditions, authority figures, and media trends.

Gender socialization is a term used to talk about the ways that children of different genders are raised and the expectations that are taught to them.

This article will cover the basics of what this term means, give some common examples, and discuss the ways that gender socialization affects how we understand gender.

What is meant by gender socialization?

Gender socialization is the process by which children learn, develop, refine, and perform the roles and expectations of their assigned gender. In Western cultures:

Infants with a vagina are traditionally assigned the gender of “girl.”
Infants with a penis are traditionally assigned the gender of “boy”
Infants with intersex variations are not traditionally recognized, and may be given surgeries to better align with the expectations of their “closest gender.”

Gender socialization can be taught to children by members of their family, their peers, popular media, or their community at large. It can involve many aspects of someone’s life experiences, such as:

encouraged activities and hobbies
accepted behavior
career and work prospects
spiritual roles and opportunities
fashion and self-expression
support structure and mental health

While the bulk of gender socialization happens as children, it can change and grow throughout your life.

For example, as boys age, they may talk with their father or trusted authority figures about what it means to “be a man.” While they will each arrive at a different answer, the process of defining it for themselves can be a large part of their transition from adolescence to adulthood.

Sex vs. gender: Language matters

This article utilizes many terms that reference sex or gender . Here’s a quick breakdown:

Female: Clinical term for one human sex variat ion, denoting XX chromosome structure.
Male: Clinical term for one human sex variation, denoting XY chromosome structure.
Intersex: Clinical term for a group of human sex variations including XXX, XXY, and other chromosomal structures.
Woman/girl: Cultural term for one gender; qualifications are varied and personal.
Man/boy: Cultural term for one gender; qualifications are varied and personal.
Nonbinary: Cultural term that can be used as a collective term for genders that fall outside the men/women binary or to indicate a specific gender with personal qualifications.
AFAB: Sociology term for someone who was raised as a girl, whether or not they currently identify with that gender. The acronym stands for “Assigned Female At Birth.”
AMAB: Sociology term for someone who was raised as a boy, whether or not they currently identify with that gender. The acronym stands for “Assigned Male At Birth.”

Within sex groups, there’s a huge variety in the way the natural human body develops, so the only way to tell for sure what sex you are is to have your chromosomes mapped. This procedure is not typically done at birth unless there’s an unrelated concern for genetic disorders.

Instead, doctors typically make an educated guess based on the newborn’s genitalia; this is why it is said that gender and sex are “assigned” at birth rather than “determined.”

Learn more about intersex variations and how they can be classified or dismissed at birth.

How are boys and girls socialized differently?

As children grow up, they are constantly absorbing information about how the world works and what their place is in it. But exactly what they’re taught can vary quite a bit between genders.

Teachings around gender roles were often prevalent in past generations. Examples include differing formalized educations across boys’ and girls’ scouting organizations or classes in etiquette for girls and chivalry for boys.

Today , it’s much more likely that child ren absorb gender roles through watching the trusted adults around them, from depictions in popular media, and from interactions with their peers. While these forms of education are more subtle, they can sometimes still be quite rigid.

The exact specifications of these gender roles can vary across cultures, regions, and time periods. Different families may also have drastically different gender roles based on their personal or religious values.

With that in mind, these are some of the ways that gender expectations frequently contrast in Western countries:

How does socialization impact our understanding of gender?

While modern understanding of gender roles is typically less restrictive than in past centuries, it can sometimes be a limiting factor in someone’s understanding of what gender is or of themselves.

Children of any gender could be kept from developing their full potential if their interests are outside their gender norm, and uncompromising gender socialization can also have other negative effects, such as:

Discrimination: Adhering to strict gender roles and expectations can encourage discrimination against any gender and put stress on individuals. Bullying also commonly focuses on gender; for example, “you throw like a girl” is used to imply weakness.

Depression: If children grow up unable to fulfill the “qualifications” of their gender, it could lead to self-esteem issues, depression , or other mental health conditions. This can be clearly seen in the increased rates of depression and suicidality in LGBT youth.

Dysphoria: Children of any gender could develop dysphoria if they do not feel that their bodies are developing in line with the expectations of their gender. Transgender children could feel alienated from themselves when not allowed to pursue their interests.

Distortion: Those raised to believe that gender is determined by biology may be given limited or incorrect information about human biology. This can hold them back in science-related courses and fields and lead to larger misunderstandings about what gender is. These teachings can also erase the rich history of different genders across nonwhite cultures.

Gender stereotypes are harmful to everyone

Minority gender groups may often lead the charge in changing gender stereotypes, but restrictive ideas about gender can be harmful to anyone — as highlighted by the attacks on Imane Kalif during the Paris 2024 Olympics .

Can children be raised without gender socialization?

Yes, our sense of gender is always changing and evolving . Currently, there is a small but growing group of parents who are choosing to raise their children without gender.

These parents typically use they/them pronouns when referring to the child and give them a gender-neutral name. The child’s anatomy is kept private to only parents and caregivers.

Children are allowed and encouraged to pursue all the healthy activities and forms of self-expression that naturally draw their attention, regardless of the gender that it’s traditionally associated with.

They’re not prohibited from exploring any age-appropriate aspects of gender, nor are they required to uphold them.

If the child is drawn to a gender expression as they grow up, their parents and community will then adjust to the name, pronouns, and other gendered language that the child prefers.

Gender socialization refers to the way that children are taught the different aspects of their gender roles as they grow up. These teachings can be formal or informal and can come from their parents, peers, popular media, and others.

While past societies have often created firm and limited gender roles for men and women, modern societies are dissolving rigid gender roles while also making room for nonbinary forms of gender expression. You can learn more about the gender binary in this article .

How we reviewed this article:

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Hoominfar E. (2021). Gender socialization. https://link.springer.com/referenceworkentry/10.1007/978-3-319-95687-9_13
Johnson DJ. (2022). Critical themes in parental socialization: the state of racial-ethnic and gender socialization. https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/15427609.2022.2106757
Rahilly E. (2022). “Well duh, that’s how you raise a kid”: Gender-open parenting in a (non)binary world. https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/27703371.2022.2089309?needAccess=true
van Oosten JMF. (2023). Gender socialization in childhood and adolescence: The role of the media in context. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/B9780128188729001278?via%3Dihub

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